Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Self Actualization, Catharsis, Euphoria, and Uggs©


A new fashion trend has swept the nation. Uggs, a style of sheepskin boot, have become, in my humble opinion, the single most important clothing advancement in human history. For only about $150 (which could buy 2 life-giving goats in a developing country, so they have to be good!) you can now have a soft, comfortable boot that both keeps your feet warm in winter, and is breathable in the summer. And the best part is, they go with everything! No longer do you have to spend tireless hours finding the right shoes for those lowrider jeans that you love so much. Just go ahead and tuck them into your Uggs. Now, due to this amazing advancement you can be rid of all that irksome individuality that has pestered you for years.

Also, because they are made of sheepskin, they aren’t harmful to the environment. Although sheep apparently have a natural affinity for being covered in wool, due to the effects of Global Warming they seem to be distancing themselves from that stereotype. Smooth appears to be all the rave in the sheep community these days.

So if the “Man” tries to impose a tyrannical school uniform upon you, tell him that you refuse to submit. Tell him he has no right to make us all the same, and take away our opportunity to jump on the latest fashion trend. Tell him that Uggs provide you with a level of social uniformity that a uniform never could.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

The sheep dies,

It includes it's skin.